Holidays bring our losses to the surface, magnify our emotions and all the things going on inside us. We're assaulted commercially with all things holiday, it’s in every store, on TV, in ads, it’s everywhere. We know it’s coming. How do we handle this?
First, know that it's okay to hurt and give yourself permission to do so.
Awareness is key! Acknowledge that the holidays will look different then what we pictured or are used to and most likely will bring a layer of challenge. Grief takes a phenomenal amount of energy. Understanding your capacity will help avoid breakdown.
Planning ahead and communicating with your people in advance, making sure everyone understands your boundaries and perhaps the need to change or avoid traditions and plans can greatly reduce the likelihood of having to do damage control. Remember, not everyone will be grieving the same way you are grieving and that the way others will want to spend the...
Losing Ari could have wrecked us as a couple. We could have become one of the statistics.
We could have given up on one another, went opposite ways when our grief did the same.
We could have wallowed in our own bubble of pain, not communicating or telling one another we need help.
But we didn't.
We found more love, more fight within us to not let her death break us, but to let her LIFE lead us.
She leads us every day to choose better. To be better as a couple. To be better parents. Better friends. Be better human beings.
It is not a walk in the park. In fact, it is more like a marathon.
But, not one other person on this planet will ever be able to understand the depth of pain we each carry more than one another.
Though we grieve differently, he gets me. He is my person.
Grief exists because love did first.
And ever since grief entered our life, it's been about finding our way through it......